Industrial society has encouraged narcissism from the start each level of so called progress, is actually only progress toward pure narcissism all round. As I began to read it helped me greatly to understand our situation and how it had got to this place. It still is for many. I did briefly contemplate he may be autistic given there are some similarities in behaviour but on reflection I dont believe this to be so. My life, is ruined. They both have symptoms, one has very severe migraines that incapacitate her for days at a time, the other gets depressed from time to time and has a continual mild epileptic condition treated by medication which hell probably have to go on taking for the rest of his life. Theres likely been more erronously diagnoses in history. Always been told i am LAZY LAZY how.. i am ADHD too! People can tolerate some poisoning in the above or they can tolerate being in anti-social clean environments but they can not do both Interesting question for sure. And before that beeing erronously diagnosed having Schizophrenia simplex. Why the denial (apart from the drug industry yes but apart from that)? Overtime, he has also changed to do some of those things too. Furthermore, many on the autistic spectrum are hyper-empathic and hyper-feeling, and if you speak with autistic people, you would know that. I also put in a huge amount of effort to let him know he was number 1 and no one would take his place. Then there is the story of the post-trauma. But I do believe my father thinks completely different to other people. All I can say from my own experience is to try to learn as much as you can about the condition to help with understanding it. He developed Alzheimers at 58yrs old and lost his words, the best way to describe it. This article generalizes far, far too much for it to be trustworthy. Marriage is conventional and can be a nightmare to undo. Break up and never look back. He is a truly great person to me just not to others. 10. The Truth About Autism And Narcissism - Mental Health Matters Cofe Living with a narcistic man I now see he had me just where he wanted me and that was always below him and to never feel anything good for myself. This is not something any of my family have had to encounter before and I really struggle with it. Some pretty disturbingly backwards and stereotyped views are portrayed here and really need amending, I.e empathy and sensitivity . Your partner will probably not be able to do the things that are important to youat least not in a satisfying manner. Someone, like a narcissist/psychopath/sociopath couldnt give a toss about pets and animals unless it benefitted them socially. ADHD and Narcissism: Is There a Connection? - Psych Central And you are correct. I never actually BELIEVED the hurt words he would say but it would still hurt. So i try to open my own eyes, sustain the face in the mirror which i do pretty well these days hehe :) . Some of the seeing form opinions, that the Blind guy is just being obstinate or purposely manipulative, because he knows more about the statue than the rest of the room, and pretends to not be able to describe the image or colour. Cut the string. I believe that is always possible. So when looking at the so called normal people, how many different traits are there? I feel Im disabled in some way and technology isnt where I ought to be investing my time and my gifts. For that matter, people who get enough sleep, sunshine and fresh air? You need to cut the string he has attached to you. My family will do ANYTHING to avoid being wrong and to pass the buck something I also take umbridge with. The limit is other people's recognition. Even if they have high IQs they are still total retards on a human level and its mostly them that run the society.. wonder why its going so bad? 4. My sister phones me from time to time, but she doesnt want to hear any more about my abuse. If I say something about myself or my family, he hijacks the conversation and makes it about him or his family. Also someone with Asbergers focusses more on themselves, where as the Narcissistic person focusses on criticising and manipulating others. This means being around people she doesnt know causes her anxiety she cant control, so to counteract this she retreats back into her safe place. He talked about moving in together when his daughter moves out in another year. You did it with the narcissism and heres my congratulations for trying your best to understand that complex situation. Went to a specialist Doctor to be assessed and tested. I think you have just left a great piece of information. I have no control over thiis as its the decision of the individual to decide for themselves. Break up and never look back. Some very dangerously incorrect information about autistic people here, probably better for you to leave it to actually autistic people. I told him I would if he kept making these remarks more appropriate to a locker room so he put it on the list as he calls it and says when the list is too long were through. Speaking from my own experience there is nothing I want more than to meet the needs of a partner and join with them spiritually. University of California, San Diego. We developed fantastic intimacy when were were in that space, and I doubt Ill find anything to compare with it. damit!) Always calm.. no drama.. no.. nothing. It may be that people with Aspergers are as varied in their characters as other folk, some of whom are incredibly cruel to animals and some of whom love then to bits. How did you come to this conclusion? Maybe I shouldnt. Perhaps a thought is to step back and look at him like he is someone you dont know, someone just on the street. Guess who was chosing me? I really struggle with this because codependents are urged to draw boundaries with people who do not meet their emotional needs. And yes if you can get away from the blackhole like spirit of these people you are unwittingly facilitating. loneliness. Im very easy going although not a push over. Thats how i dealt with previous therapist that was trying to destroy me same way as my mother was.I had to write down her acitons and words in a general email to the healthcare departmet where she was working to have them and her figure she had fucked up. Given an unlucky start, I have subsequently been extraordinarily lucky. But, even if i know i am sensitive, empathic. This is because they are two separate conditions with separate causes. Because nobody is ruining everything i do in my back. The difference between these women is really easy to spot. Autism and a Narcissistic Personality Disorder could suit him? I havent had the courage to put myself back out there since an adult diagnosis because I want to get things right and dont feel Im ready. When we watch TV, films etc. I don't want to be a narcissist | Asperger's & Autism Community - Wrong He knew he wasnt marriage material which I deeply respected, mainly because he didnt want to be responsible for a wife or children. Thats my biggest question right now. However after a while new events/situations became more frequent, and I had no clue or understanding to respond to them same outcome, she left. Good day if I may add it to this reply. I didnt want to hurt them or have children that would end up like me. Yes they may not realise that their emotions confuse the more normal people, but they do have a certain amount of empathy. So very saddening. I had to write to the director of the foundation here and expose the entire situation in a group email .. to force them into action. He said it was the way they unwind their minds that are on overload. The flashback was in real time, I felt intolerable pain, and also the emotion of terror. Good luck but definitely question his actions in your own mind if you feel they are not right. Narcissism or Asperger's? How to Tell the Difference You can ask him to leave if you have the courage, as maybe living separately will give you both more freedom to run your own lives independently, especially financially. I felt by explaining the above, it could help in knowing what level youre on to know how to handle it. And Im now again trying to keep up. Thats changing because she has done so much therapy and is in a healthier place than she could ever have hoped to be. Narcissism or Asperger's? How to Tell the Difference he a generous man, kind in a funny way, like washing dishes, hoovering, etc without asking. Delilah The bipolar seems to be more like borderline disorder than bipolar even though my family as strong bipolar genes. So on top of all that.. i am trying to convince myself that im smart, good, etc. I know that this is the wrong thing to do but it is a powerful thing that certain people have over me, and try as I might, it is a habit that I have yet to be successful breaking. I know that doesnt work so well for narcissists though, given the often extreme lack of self awareness. He was a very hands on dad, but always felt like he wasnt good enough not understanding himself with aspergers. I did this often to remind myself what I was dealing with. The reason Im relating this is because whether a person is Autistic or otherwise they are people!!!! these so called personality disorders simply do not exist It was one of the saddest days of my life yet it was also one of the most powerful as I had spend a lifetime being controlled by this man I tried so hard to love. Instead of him understanding our limited funds, the needs he has, and the terrible ripoff the rental market is here, he just keeps insisting its all my fault and my bad choices. With my 3 bro/sis all narc to heavy level its sure i was meant to be or .. am i? I have no attacks, no one everyday is trying to ruin my life. This article is 100% correct. Consequently I had a melt down myself and put space between us. He certainly seems to be a box of tricks. One minute you are feeling ok about your relationship and the next asking yourself was it you that caused the situation where you needed time apart. It would be good if this article was at the very least amended because it still comes up in search terms and it is perpetuating harmful beliefs. I will note these books, one of which he was recommended by his therapist.The Body Keeps The Score. Everything at the right time to make me fail all i try to achieve and dig dig always with that massive guilt moutain they keep building to push me to suicide. These experiences and many many more in life, has contributed to a metaphor, this has helped me clarify what happens in life, Imagine: group of 10 people in a room with a small bust in the centre of the people sitting around it, one person is totally blind (but he has no idea he is) The other seeing people dont know hes blind but just has some peculiar mannerisms, everyone is talking about the lovely blue marble bust of a Queen. I liked him a lot and have a lot of experience regarding mental illness due to growing up with a parents affliction, but this I hadnt encountered. I want to be able to do more observing and not inhaling and absorbing that behavior, but you can probably tell that this is of course what I do. she left. I was partner of person with high functioning Aspergers for 18 years. were also capable of doing it unintentionally, and sometimes thats due to our autism, sometimes it isnt, and sometimes its a mixed issue. This article is disappointing. He compliments me on how I look etc, mostly physical things.